Bangladesh? Saudi Arabia?
Whenever I meet new people or visit to relatives the most common questions asked are "How do you like Bangladesh? Which country you prefer to live---Saudi Arabia or Bangladesh? Do you miss the place where you grew up? It never end
My answer would always be "Both" or " Food is great in saudi" (this part is true though) or "It is hot in Bangladesh! No AC!!"
As few years passes by(it has been over two years!! it is astonishing how time flies~~) I had time to think about it. Then I realized my answers above was only because I did not knew the answer myself and said it what other people did. Basically those answer were repeated by people before me so I said the same. Now that I lived here I got my thought on living away from the place bit arranged; but it is not clear to me yet.
I came to Saudi Arabia when I was around four years old;it was on the year 1995 I think.I don't exactly remember the moment I step on the place; but I remember vaguely the moment I step out from Bangladesh. The first time before I left BD,there was lot of quietness around; and lot of sad face and sad smiles My relatives was holding theirs tear back; and they told me they will be missing me. I remembered when I asked them why they are not crying it is that moment tears poured out from their eye in a never-ending stream.( My youngest khalamoni ran to dining take and sneak water bottle and flush some water into her eye and came back saying: Dekho ami tomar jonno koto kadtesi!!(see how much I am crying for you!!). That very moment still etched in my memory.
Was it too hard for me to cope living away from the place I grew up? No. In fact it felt I came back to place where I left a years ago. It kind of felt natural. I did not crawl in corner of the bed missing KSA; nor I did not wake up with heavy heart. I have always,always wondered: why it is that I am not feeling the way other people did? Was my life in KSA was that forgettable? Don't I have any emotion to a place where I spent half of my life? I decided maybe I am that cold hearted; or I dont really have good memories there.
But when I went to Saudi Arabia for my first semester break of my first year of my university; the seconds I stepped on the tite of my building;my eyes almost welled up with tears. It was not like memories came flooding to my mind or I was excited(wait.... may be I was excited)arriving there; nothing like those sort happened. just my eyes went wet. I wish there was better word I can put; but I could not. But then after I went back to hectic traffic populated country I soon forgot about that. Alo this was only one time, those stuff on my eye happen, but for the rest of the semester breaks vacation, thos "eye watering" stopped. Yeah.... my mind work in strange way.
But I could admit this much that my real growth and strength got established in Bangladesh.I got to know myself;something which I never did back in old place. I played my strength in K SA but I realised my strength in BD. I played my soul in KSA but I acknowledged my soul in BD. All in short ; KSA had me being confused clumsy girl but I got the chance to be confused clumsy girl in BD. Did that even make sense? No.....I suck at phrasing. Oh well, confused me!.
That all I could put my two cent on whole shifting from one place to another. I still have not figured out the answer, I wont be desperate about it. Everything take time so.......
Okay I feel like I will end up being embarrassed talking about it next day. :/ Before I do that, I better post it.
NOTE-----My Horrible Midterm Finally Got Over......Yay!!!
My answer would always be "Both" or " Food is great in saudi" (this part is true though) or "It is hot in Bangladesh! No AC!!"
As few years passes by(it has been over two years!! it is astonishing how time flies~~) I had time to think about it. Then I realized my answers above was only because I did not knew the answer myself and said it what other people did. Basically those answer were repeated by people before me so I said the same. Now that I lived here I got my thought on living away from the place bit arranged; but it is not clear to me yet.
I came to Saudi Arabia when I was around four years old;it was on the year 1995 I think.I don't exactly remember the moment I step on the place; but I remember vaguely the moment I step out from Bangladesh. The first time before I left BD,there was lot of quietness around; and lot of sad face and sad smiles My relatives was holding theirs tear back; and they told me they will be missing me. I remembered when I asked them why they are not crying it is that moment tears poured out from their eye in a never-ending stream.( My youngest khalamoni ran to dining take and sneak water bottle and flush some water into her eye and came back saying: Dekho ami tomar jonno koto kadtesi!!(see how much I am crying for you!!). That very moment still etched in my memory.
Was it too hard for me to cope living away from the place I grew up? No. In fact it felt I came back to place where I left a years ago. It kind of felt natural. I did not crawl in corner of the bed missing KSA; nor I did not wake up with heavy heart. I have always,always wondered: why it is that I am not feeling the way other people did? Was my life in KSA was that forgettable? Don't I have any emotion to a place where I spent half of my life? I decided maybe I am that cold hearted; or I dont really have good memories there.
But when I went to Saudi Arabia for my first semester break of my first year of my university; the seconds I stepped on the tite of my building;my eyes almost welled up with tears. It was not like memories came flooding to my mind or I was excited(wait.... may be I was excited)arriving there; nothing like those sort happened. just my eyes went wet. I wish there was better word I can put; but I could not. But then after I went back to hectic traffic populated country I soon forgot about that. Alo this was only one time, those stuff on my eye happen, but for the rest of the semester breaks vacation, thos "eye watering" stopped. Yeah.... my mind work in strange way.
But I could admit this much that my real growth and strength got established in Bangladesh.I got to know myself;something which I never did back in old place. I played my strength in K SA but I realised my strength in BD. I played my soul in KSA but I acknowledged my soul in BD. All in short ; KSA had me being confused clumsy girl but I got the chance to be confused clumsy girl in BD. Did that even make sense? No.....I suck at phrasing. Oh well, confused me!.
That all I could put my two cent on whole shifting from one place to another. I still have not figured out the answer, I wont be desperate about it. Everything take time so.......
Okay I feel like I will end up being embarrassed talking about it next day. :/ Before I do that, I better post it.
NOTE-----My Horrible Midterm Finally Got Over......Yay!!!
You are one funny person! LMAO! :D Okay, I am gonna guess you like Saudi more than Bangladesh. I can somehow relate to this as I spent my childhood in abroad too, you know. I miss Qatar a lot! You are really lucky that you get to visit Saudi often unlike me. :( Whatsoever, there are a few things I like about Bangladesh. This is my own country and I have got a large, close-knit family here. Though, it is not like I get to party with them all the time We do have fights and other issues among us. I think growing up in a big family taught me a lot of problem solving and how to share and compromise(that's a quote a copied from somewhere -_-). Well, in your case, the scenario might not be the same. That's because it's been just two years you've moved here. So, it's gonna take a little more time for you to get along with your family and relatives. And then you will actually get the real feeling of satisfaction and enjoyment of having moved here to your own place. Best wishes to you. <3
ReplyDeleteYeah I guess so. One of the quote from once upon a time:
ReplyDeleteIt's how you know you really got a home. When you leave it there's this feeling you can't shake. You just miss it.
----Neal
I guess I am still waiting to feel like that. -_-